How to Choose a Prospective Husband!!

Since some members of The Society for the Promotion of Elegant British Literature are still single at this time (also since no one seems interested in the previous two Jane Austen Handbook posts), I decided it might be a good time to discuss this very important decision.

"Tell Mary that I make over Mr. Heartley & all of his Estate to her for her sole use and Benefit in the future, & not only him but all my other Admirers into the bargain wherever she can find them, even the kiss which C. Powlett wanted to give me, as I mean to confine myself in future to Mr. Tom Lefroy, for whom I do not care sixpence." Jane Austen

(Now we know the real reason that Jane would want to confine herself to Mr. Tom Lefroy, he has a striking resemblance to James McAvoy, and I do not know many women who would turn him down.)



Choosing a husband should be done so with the utmost consideration because once you are married you are in fact stuck with him. (This is especially true when you marry a rich man with a fancy estate, he will of course control the fortune. And let's face it, no girl sets her sights on a poor man.) The following questions should be asked honestly in an attempt to go into the match with eyes wide open.

Does he have a good income?
A little economy is good, but not at the expense of the elegant things in life.

Does he have good principles?
Bad boys are fun for little flirtations, as a lady must keep in practice, but do not marry someone whom you will need to change. This will not happen. Find a good man and treasure him.

Is he handsome?
He should be or at least close to handsome. (Remember that the large fortune and estates of these men can in fact increase their handsomeness.)



Is he a sensible man?
Do not marry a silly or stupid man. Then your neighbors will be making sport of you not the other way around. If he turns out to be silly, hopefully he is easily controlled, so you can almost always avoid his company.

Does he have a sense of humour?
Being laughed at is part of life. You will need to help him learn. A man with no sense of humour will be complemented by a woman who is lively, this will be a point of interest to him. And hopefully she will be able to make him be less boring.

Does he love you?
Reasons for not marrying a man include, he is in want of your fortune or position, he feels an obligation toward you or because of an infatuation that will pass. If you marry for these reasons the marriage will be intolerable.

Do you love him?
The most important question of all. Things will only make you happy for a little while, you will be happiest if you love him. If he is a good man, and has made you love him then your chance for a happy marriage is very good indeed.